My Scam Story by Debby Montgomery Johnson, Author, Founder, The Woman Behind the Smile, Inc.Chair, Board of Directors, Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams
“It was NOT my fault. I am NOT alone. I am a SURVIVOR. Axios!
After my husband passed away, I unexpectedly found myself running his company, a responsibility I had never planned for but embraced to preserve his legacy.
The “adventures” began when friends told me to “get a life” about six months after Lou passed. I went to a faith-based dating site and over time, what seemed to be a sincere online relationship, “Dr. Eric Cole” carefully built emotional trust, drew me into his family and business, and gradually encouraged me to “help him.”
Our story, and the deception, ended only when he unexpectedly confessed and came online LIVE for the first time. In that moment, I was left facing not only devastating financial loss but also deep emotional trauma and overwhelming shame. The FBI and law enforcement labeled me a victim, but I struggled with that word because I did not want the crime to define who I was. I had been the target of a two-year international romance fraud that cost me more than one million dollars.
For years, I stayed silent. I continued to present a confident, successful public image while privately carrying embarrassment and self-blame. My turning point came when I shared my experience at a professional gathering and heard other women openly discuss their own experiences with fraud, betrayal, and financial exploitation. I realized how widespread relationship frauds had become and how many people remained silent because of fear and stigma. In that moment, I understood that silence only allowed these crimes to continue harming others.
Recovery for me meant reframing what had happened. I was not foolish or careless; I had been targeted by sophisticated criminals who relied on deception and psychological manipulation. Accepting that truth helped me reclaim my confidence and redirect my energy toward advocacy. I began speaking publicly, supporting other survivors through the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams (SCARS) and educating individuals about the warning signs of online relationship fraud so they could protect themselves and report these crimes.
Today, my mission is centered on awareness, survivor empowerment, and prevention. By sharing my story openly, I work to reduce the stigma surrounding fraud victimization and help others recognize the tactics used by the criminals. My message is simple: Beware and Be Aware. Through education, community support, and the courage to speak up, recovery becomes possible—and together we can reduce the impact of relationship fraud around the world, and we work to ensure NO VICTIM BLAME!”